Oh The Places He Will Go
Written By: Emmanuella "Manny" Williams
GO TO SLEEP! That was the order from my husband, who was completely frustrated as I switched sides and fluffed my pillows for thousandth time. My phone said that it was 3:30AM and that meant that I had only 30 mins of sleep left before the my alarm would go off and I would need to get up and start my day. I had been up since 1:30 going through a mental check list of things to do and people to see.
Don’t forget Nathan has play dates on Tuesday and Friday.
Layla has one in 2 weeks but it’s on a Saturday.
Did I send off the YMCA applications?
Where are we going to live?
Will we find a church?
Will we sell this house?
Will I like the Trainers at the Toledo OTF….. (I know 1st world problems)
The list went on and on until they piled up on my chest and started to suffocate me. With a Gasp, I sat up and tried to shake it off. What in the world was wrong with me? This would be my 4th big move in 6 years; I should not be worried at all because I had done this a million times… right? Wrong. This time was a little bit different. This move to Toledo meant that I would be transitioning out of Corporate America. I never realized how much I relied on my job to tell me “who” and “whose” I am. I lay there feeling lost. Gone will be the days where I will be able to use the excuse… I am too busy; for the things that I am too scared to do. No more can I say… I would chase my dreams but my career gets in the way. The consistency of a paycheck could no longer be the rationale for not taking risks. I felt like I was in that dream where you realize that you are in class naked. What if “I” fail? What if “we” fail? What if… What if…?
I had to do something in order to not just go crazy right in that moment so I read the devotional for that day. Something that I usually don’t have time to do. The verse for that day was:
Joshua 1:9
“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous.
Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”
Wow!! How on time was that word? These were the words that God had spoken to Joshua as he was about to lead the children of Israel into the promise land. Just like that I realized that there is not a place that I could go that God has not been. I won’t just do "better in Toledo" but I will do better where ever he sends me. Today is Day 1 in Toledo and I have occasional panic attacks about a million uncertain things with this move… even our address. But now I am prepared; each time I have those moments, I read Joshua 1:9 and I’m remember… “Oh the Place HE Will Go” to be with me.
Don’t forget Nathan has play dates on Tuesday and Friday.
Layla has one in 2 weeks but it’s on a Saturday.
Did I send off the YMCA applications?
Where are we going to live?
Will we find a church?
Will we sell this house?
Will I like the Trainers at the Toledo OTF….. (I know 1st world problems)
The list went on and on until they piled up on my chest and started to suffocate me. With a Gasp, I sat up and tried to shake it off. What in the world was wrong with me? This would be my 4th big move in 6 years; I should not be worried at all because I had done this a million times… right? Wrong. This time was a little bit different. This move to Toledo meant that I would be transitioning out of Corporate America. I never realized how much I relied on my job to tell me “who” and “whose” I am. I lay there feeling lost. Gone will be the days where I will be able to use the excuse… I am too busy; for the things that I am too scared to do. No more can I say… I would chase my dreams but my career gets in the way. The consistency of a paycheck could no longer be the rationale for not taking risks. I felt like I was in that dream where you realize that you are in class naked. What if “I” fail? What if “we” fail? What if… What if…?
I had to do something in order to not just go crazy right in that moment so I read the devotional for that day. Something that I usually don’t have time to do. The verse for that day was:
Joshua 1:9
“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous.
Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”
Wow!! How on time was that word? These were the words that God had spoken to Joshua as he was about to lead the children of Israel into the promise land. Just like that I realized that there is not a place that I could go that God has not been. I won’t just do "better in Toledo" but I will do better where ever he sends me. Today is Day 1 in Toledo and I have occasional panic attacks about a million uncertain things with this move… even our address. But now I am prepared; each time I have those moments, I read Joshua 1:9 and I’m remember… “Oh the Place HE Will Go” to be with me.