Get Out Of The Boat
Written By: Gloria Reyes
In college, I heard a story about how we are all born with a “boat.” Some of us are born with “yachts” – easy and smooth-sailing, equipped with all the amenities one could possibly wish for. Others are born with “fisherman boats” – these are reliable, well-equipped and, overall, not too shabby. Finally, many of us are born with “rafts” – no motor, no frills, nothing. I remember instantly identifying with the “raft folks.” I grew up below the so-called poverty line. I am a first generation American with parents from Mexico who received a sixth grade education in a poor, rural village. Besides the popular belief, things never came easy to me and I always felt like I had to start two steps behind everyone else when it came to school, sports, work, etc. Sure, I excelled in many of those areas by worldly measures, but it didn’t come without a crazy amount of effort. But this didn’t break the “raft” mentality of trying to measure up to higher standards that I had set – or that I allowed society to set – on me. I achieved everything that this world said you should: college – check, grad school – check, great job – check, husband – check, kids – check/check. I put on a front that told everyone “I have it all together.”
As I grew older, I entered a different kind of boat. You know that place where you allow yourself to become comfortable and complacent? You wake up and do the same thing each day. You are working and striving towards something, but then you realize that you have no idea what that “something” really is. You come to this scary realization that you’ve already lived so much of your life, yet you aren’t really getting anywhere you wanted to go in the first place? You feel like “where is this boat taking me?”
Yeah, that’s the boat I found myself in over 4 years ago after I had my first daughter, Gianna. I was on maternity leave and in the brief moments when I wasn’t nursing, changing a nasty diaper or consoling her, I actually had some time to consider what I was doing with my life. Up to that point, I had been spending life working crazy hours, training for and running marathons and continuing to heal my once broken marriage. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that during this time, I also started to pray different prayers. My prayers were no longer about me, me, me, me, me. They were now about my family, friends, others, and, most importantly, how I could be a light in this super-broken world. Within a year, one of the pastors at church approached me and my husband because he heard about our marriage testimony and he wanted us to share it on video for a marriage conference. A year earlier, I would have been like “Heck no! There’s too much, it’s too messy and I don’t want anyone to know the truth and look at us differently!” It was that “raft” mentality that I had of wanting to live up to certain standards and keep the façade of “having it all together.” But no, not anymore – I could hear the Lord saying “get out of the boat and walk on this water.” I had been in my comfy boat for so long that it was NOT easy – it was all I ever knew. But I decided to step out – leap out – of the boat of complacency and walked onto the cold, dark water of the unknown. I wanted to show folks that real life is not the fake junk that our society tries to feed us; real life is messy and miraculous at the same time. After all, this is what I had been praying for – to be a light in a broken world. So, as tough as it was, we filmed that video and when I saw it come on the screen at the conference with hundreds of people watching, I knew I could never go back to the boat. Afterward, so many couples reached out to thank us for our transparency and how they no longer felt alone. Oh, what beauty there is in not being able to go back to the way things were!
Since then, we have been part of the leadership team for Marriage Revolution, the marriage ministry at our church. Watching couples go from broken, or just ok, to thriving is nothing short of amazing and I want to see more of it. I’m hungry for it. Had I not gotten out of my boat, I would not have witnessed true marital miracles happen the way I do now.
So, I ask you, what is your boat? Are you going a million miles a minute that you can’t even stop to think about what you truly were meant for? Stop. Just stop. What is your boat – the “comfortable” boat that you are scared to walk away from to pursue your purpose? Is it your job? Is it your hometown? Is it your past? Is it a friend/dating relationship? Is it a deeply held belief? Is it an addiction? Is it social media? It could be anything, but you know what it is. You hear the calling – it screams inside of you day in and day out – but you try to mute it by staying in your comfy boat. I urge you, make 2017 the year you finally decide to GET OUT OF THE BOAT! You, too, will walk on the water of the amazing unknown and never want to look back.
As I grew older, I entered a different kind of boat. You know that place where you allow yourself to become comfortable and complacent? You wake up and do the same thing each day. You are working and striving towards something, but then you realize that you have no idea what that “something” really is. You come to this scary realization that you’ve already lived so much of your life, yet you aren’t really getting anywhere you wanted to go in the first place? You feel like “where is this boat taking me?”
Yeah, that’s the boat I found myself in over 4 years ago after I had my first daughter, Gianna. I was on maternity leave and in the brief moments when I wasn’t nursing, changing a nasty diaper or consoling her, I actually had some time to consider what I was doing with my life. Up to that point, I had been spending life working crazy hours, training for and running marathons and continuing to heal my once broken marriage. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that during this time, I also started to pray different prayers. My prayers were no longer about me, me, me, me, me. They were now about my family, friends, others, and, most importantly, how I could be a light in this super-broken world. Within a year, one of the pastors at church approached me and my husband because he heard about our marriage testimony and he wanted us to share it on video for a marriage conference. A year earlier, I would have been like “Heck no! There’s too much, it’s too messy and I don’t want anyone to know the truth and look at us differently!” It was that “raft” mentality that I had of wanting to live up to certain standards and keep the façade of “having it all together.” But no, not anymore – I could hear the Lord saying “get out of the boat and walk on this water.” I had been in my comfy boat for so long that it was NOT easy – it was all I ever knew. But I decided to step out – leap out – of the boat of complacency and walked onto the cold, dark water of the unknown. I wanted to show folks that real life is not the fake junk that our society tries to feed us; real life is messy and miraculous at the same time. After all, this is what I had been praying for – to be a light in a broken world. So, as tough as it was, we filmed that video and when I saw it come on the screen at the conference with hundreds of people watching, I knew I could never go back to the boat. Afterward, so many couples reached out to thank us for our transparency and how they no longer felt alone. Oh, what beauty there is in not being able to go back to the way things were!
Since then, we have been part of the leadership team for Marriage Revolution, the marriage ministry at our church. Watching couples go from broken, or just ok, to thriving is nothing short of amazing and I want to see more of it. I’m hungry for it. Had I not gotten out of my boat, I would not have witnessed true marital miracles happen the way I do now.
So, I ask you, what is your boat? Are you going a million miles a minute that you can’t even stop to think about what you truly were meant for? Stop. Just stop. What is your boat – the “comfortable” boat that you are scared to walk away from to pursue your purpose? Is it your job? Is it your hometown? Is it your past? Is it a friend/dating relationship? Is it a deeply held belief? Is it an addiction? Is it social media? It could be anything, but you know what it is. You hear the calling – it screams inside of you day in and day out – but you try to mute it by staying in your comfy boat. I urge you, make 2017 the year you finally decide to GET OUT OF THE BOAT! You, too, will walk on the water of the amazing unknown and never want to look back.
How I Met The Author
Gloria Reyes... or "G-Rey" (as my husband and I like to call her) and I met while working in our first roles at the Baytown Refinery... yes, it was as glamorous as it sounds. Our working relationship made us teammates but attending Grace Church together made us friends. As a co-worker, she was that person that you always wanted to have on your team and as a friend you knew that she would put everything she had into the relationship. In everything that she does, she gives her all and her heart shines through. I have always admired how Gloria lives passionately. Each time I read, Colossians 3:23 I think of Gloria. It says..."Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters". Just like work, life isn't easy but I love that Gloria always shows up with her "whole heart"....ready to work with me, pray for me and most importantly... genuinely love me.
Gloria Reyes... or "G-Rey" (as my husband and I like to call her) and I met while working in our first roles at the Baytown Refinery... yes, it was as glamorous as it sounds. Our working relationship made us teammates but attending Grace Church together made us friends. As a co-worker, she was that person that you always wanted to have on your team and as a friend you knew that she would put everything she had into the relationship. In everything that she does, she gives her all and her heart shines through. I have always admired how Gloria lives passionately. Each time I read, Colossians 3:23 I think of Gloria. It says..."Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters". Just like work, life isn't easy but I love that Gloria always shows up with her "whole heart"....ready to work with me, pray for me and most importantly... genuinely love me.